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UNCLE PASHA'S FAMOUS
FIELD-TESTED LIST OF TRAVEL ITEMS -
A REASONABLE COMPROMISE BETWEEN COMFORT AND MOBILITY
Introduction: The
bulk of this document was compiled before I went respectable, back in 1995 or 96, when I
travelled extensively myself. I put it together to help me pack and re-pack.
Although most of it still applies in 2002, Russia has considerably mellowed as a travel
destination... Please excuse me for having inserted links to pages of commercial
significance. - pv
Traveller's Checklist
Keep it by the door and take a quick look at it
before leaving. Check that you have all with you before leaving a hotel room or a
campsite. This list was created and field-tested by Paul Voytinsky personally, who
survived to post it on the Web to help those planning their escape from the civilized
world to do so in an orderly and comfortable manner.
Items are listed by categories in alphabetical
order. Some overlap exists between sections.
Comments, contributions appreciated...
....Just received a complaint to the effect
that I've failed to cover women's issues. OK, permit me to withhold mentioning it by name
but consider it included. And please enlighten me if there is there anything esele
they need?....
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Hygiene & Personal Care
- blindfolds - Quite handy when attempting to
sleep under bright lights and an essential item when travelling to places where shooting
is their favourite method of execution.
- condoms - Good luck. Pampered Westerners:
Do not assume these things are universally available. And the VD situation in my dear
native land is pretty serious, and the distance between going to the movies and to bed is
pret-ty short. Sometimes the sequence is even reversed! [2001 addition: www.unclepasha.com/dating.htm)
- dental floss - Same comment as above, minus
"good luck". Actually, I'm pleased to report that there've been confirmed
sightings of this item on the shelves of some Moscow stores.
- deodorant - A profound observation: human
bodies tend to stink less when their owners takes them out into the woods (or other form
of nature). Wonder what message they are sending us.... BO and PG are generally less of a
problem in the bush than one might expect.
- detergent/dishwashing liquid - There was
excellent stuff, called Dr. Bonners or something, which serves beautifully as soap,
shampoo, dishwashing liquid, laundry detergent and even insect repellant. I haven't seen
it for years, but be aware that there are a few things like that which make life almost
tolerable. Next best substitute is olive oil soap.
- ear plugs - Need I remind you of the
potential danger in using these e.g. on the trains in the former Communist Block
countries? Speaking of train robberies, you may want to take a look at the poetic
re-creation of my Polish experience by clicking here
- hair cornb - Better take two or three. They
tend to get lost a lot. Avoid black, white, and especially green haircombs because they
get lost even easier.
- Q-tips - I find few sensations more
disagreeable than that of dirty ear channels. May be hard to find in Russia.
- razors - I recommend small disposable ones,
a couple per trip. Electric rasors results in all kinds of hassle, like different voltage,
wrong type sockets etc. Once a battery-operated device started in the suitcase of one of
my fellow travellers after she checked it in, resulting in a major commotion among the the
airport security people. Or grow a beard, as I eventually did.
- rubbing alcohol - Give yourself a good rub
with this thing in the absence of proper facilities. Once back in 1993 I went for three
whole days without access to shower AND AM STILL ALIVE TO TELL YOU ABOUT IT, thanks to a
$1.79Can bottle ot isopropyl alcohol from K-Mart. BTW, I find K-Mart to be consistently
best/cheapest for drugs and toiletries. ... Since I wrote this, I ran out of my
Canadian stock, spent some time in utter misery, but discovered that in my dear native
land this stuff is sold at gasoline stations as fuel system dryer, at a price consistent
with Moscow's reputation as the 3rd or 4th most expensive city.
- scissors (+ toenail clippers)
- soap - see the note above under Detergent.
- sponge - It should be of the type easy to
squeeze dry. Avoid natural materials, as these will rot and stink in the cozy warmness of
your knapsack.
- shampoo - Try to get Dr. Bonner's because
it can be used as both shampoo and soap
- toilet paper - Take more rather then less.
Naive Western travellers note: Equipping shitters with this vital accessory is by no means
universal. Pleased to report that properly equipped washrooms are becoming more common in
Moscow. Long live Luzhkov, our Mayor!!
- toothbrush -
- toothpaste - Make sure the paste
comes in a STRONG tube, and don't forget the floss
- towel - I find that one is sufficient for
most trips. But it is also "almost" an essential. At the same time it is a pain
to dry.
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Clothing
- Footware - two pairs
- LOTS of socks. I REALLY MEAN
LOTS. Few things more disagreeable than the sensation of wet feet. Russian sidewalks are
constructed as puddle accumulators...
- Pajamas, while strictly speaking
not an essential item, gives such a great level of comfort that I prefer to take them.
Plus, they can double as underwear.
- Hat with floppy ears (for either
extreme of temperature)
- Gloves. Yes, have a pair
thin gloves on you even in the summer. For hygiene if nothing else. Since I am having tea
at the moment I will not dig into my memory in search of episodes when they came in handy,
such as when I had to drag this runover dog from the road...
. Information
- beeper - For remotely checking messages on
your answering machine (only for the wimps like me who don't dare to go for a complete and
uncompromising escape).
- book - You'll have less time to read than
you think, so take one, but a good one.
- calculator - Few things are more
disorienting than having to deal with inflated currencies with lots of zeros and pictures
of acting presidents without this little device.
- camera & film - Actually, I am moving
towards the view that images worth keeping can't be registered by the camera in the hands
of ordinary mortals.
- cellular phone + charger -
- compass
- computer - notebook, and don't forget the
charger and cables to hook into any telephone jack.. also need a power supply adaptor
- e-mail - The situation is quickly
improving, with every city over 50000 tending to have internet access. But do forward your
mail to some web-based address, such as yahoo or hotmail.
- floppy diskettes - A somewhat unexpected
item... But every second trip I wished I had one on me until I made it an official
travel essential.
- map - NOT an absolute essential. Some
perverts have been known to use getting lost as an excuse to study the country from the
inside and interact with the locals. WARNING: ABILITY TO GIVE DIRECTIONS IS NOT A
UNIVERSAL HUMAN TRAIT, BUT A RARE PECULIARITY FOUND IN THE ANALYTIC AND LOGOCENTRIC
WESTERN CULTURE. So, use this "getting lost" culturological technique with GREAT
caution.
- marker - Handy for leaving "I was
here" on cliffs, making hitchhiking signs or, when it gets real bad, writing
"Will work for food" on a piece of cardboard.
- notepad - Or a notebook for the more
prolific
- pens - Take LOTS - they tend to get lost.
- telephone list
- wrist watch - They tend to get awfully
irritating when walking. Thinking of crossing this item out. A pocket alarm clock is
better. Something small, tough, light, loud, and RELIABLE. I'm happy with my Casio travel
alarm clock (a remarkably noisy thing for its size). Or buy a Casio water-proof wrist
watch. I had it for many years tinder real tough conditions until it got stolen when I
neglected to lock the I door of my old Zaporozhets ...
- this list - Look at it before leaving the
camp site, lest you forget something.
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"Household & Survival"
There is a lot of overlap between these two
categories, thus I decided to unite them.
- Axe - Only if going into the
woods. Some recommend an ice-pick instead ... My recent aquisition: an old Soviet army
survival kit consisting of an axe, a hammer, and wood saw. Cost: $25 US. Can be found at
the bicycle market in front of the Salut (or Voskhod?) store (Sokolniki).
- Batteries - I keep batteries and
a spare bulb taped to the flashlight. But this whole arragement tends to attract intense
interest of the airport security people. Perhaps I will cross this out in favour of a
candle.
- Insect repellent - If you forget
one, olive oil soap could do a reasonable job. Soviet "Khozyaistvennoye" soap
scares mosquitoes by its very look.
- Candle - Your flashlight WILL
fail. Plus, candles are indispensable for frozen locks and bad zippers. Buy flat variety
in aluminum cups ($4 per 100 at IKEA)
- Burner (and fuel) - A
gasoline-powered one-burner stove is preferable. Russian-made "Primus" is one
remarkably reliable, powerful, economical and portable source of heat if you don't mind
the smell of gazoline.
- Knife (w. can opener and fork)
- Lighters - They are considerably
more water-proof than matches.
- Matches - Have a few boxes,
stored in different places. Wrap one in plastic even if the weather is dry.
- Metal cup - A large metal cup
(0.5 to 1 liter) is probably the most universal of containers.
- Money and documents - In a good
container, wrapped in plastic. Remember about eggs and baskets!! And don't sleep in Polish
trains.
- Needle, threat, safety pins
- Plastic bags - Has many other
uses than the one described by Dr. Humphry
- Safety pins (lots!) - Some of the
most important/versatile items.
- Wood saw - Thinking of getting a
so-called "manual chain saw", i.e. a chain with two handles. Very compact and
said to be quite efficient … See a note under Axe.
- Shovel - There is a verse in the
Deuteronomy somewhere to the effect that a shovel is an important thing to have in a camp
or else one very important personage may step into it and get real pissed, and thus
withdraw his support. Anyone knows the exact chapter and verse?
Documents etc.
- Passports and visas
- Student ID
- Driver's license (s)
- Telephone list
- Birth certificate (for looking
for work or otherwise puting your roots down)
- Diploma (if you may be looking
for work)
- Money. And don't assume
your dollars will be always accepted. Last year I spent a cold April night in the woods
somewhere in the Novgorod region with a few hundred-dollar bills in my pocket. Make sure
your dollar bills are new.
- Credit cards (and don't assume
they'll always work)
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Food etc.
Don't overload on food. Actually, Westerners are
OK that way, but Russians make travel a very hard process by their obsession with having
enough to eat. Hey folks, you can go 30 days without food, so what's the concern?!
If you are going to take food with you, I
recomend Chinese instant noodles. They can be turned into noodles as God intended them,
into soop, or eaten dry without ill effects. And one tiny package weighting probably 50g
makes a breakfast.
Take some cigarettes and something with alcohol
in it. Cigarettes may help in establishing contact with the locals in Russia. Perhaps they
should be listed under "survival" ... I recall the Doctor Who serial, where the
famous space and time traveller and bearer of lofty ideals would often avoid certain death
by offering jelly beans to various monsters and villains.
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Household
Also see SURVIVAL and MISCELLANEOUS
- Axe or hatchet. I was
thinking of a heavy hatchet as more aesthetically appealing, but Yura T. (+) reminded me
that it may draw attention from the airport security people, the police and such, and
require the owner to do lots of explaining.
- Burner (with fuel) ... I've
already mentioned the Russian-made "Primus". Buy a "real" gasoline
container for backpackers. Anything else won't hold the stuff.
- Hammock
- Tent
- Sleeping bag
Car
Travelling by car in Russia is for creative
suicide devotees only. The towing rope is probably the most important thing.
Sometime I will give you a list of stuff I keep in my car. Given that I didn't disappear
in the vast Russian planes, and that I had it towed only a couple of times in seven years,
I must be doing something right.
Planning a car
trip? If you have money to burn and your risk tolerance is high, write me to inbox@unclepasha.com, paul_voytinsky@yahoo.com
Packing procedure
I recomend a beltbag or a pouch for documents,
and a hunter's vest for a bit of everything you need to have on you at all times.
[January 2000 insert: I've
given up on the hunter's vest. First, it makes sitting inconvenient. Second, things tend
to get lost in its many pockets. A good knapsack is more practical.]
For now, let it be the end of the
list.
Welcome to Russia, whatever brings
you here
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List established somewhere
around 1997 and largely reflects situation common in that era
