You have your photos against the background of every imaginable landmark. The pyramids
make you yawn. You've been to luxury resorts. You've tried eco-tourism. You've gone to
working trips abroad. You've done sex in Thailand and drugs in Amsterdam. You've stayed in
Hymalayan buddhist monasteries and hand-fed pinguins in the Antarctic. You've seen it all.
People, cultures and countries no longer amuse you. Realization that in six thousand years
of civilization humanity haven't generated enough entertainment for just this one lousy
lifetime of yours makes you dangerously bored.
For the sophisticated misanthrope you've become we are pround to present the new
revolutionary contept of
"Come look at, laugh at and feel for
those people not quite so fortunate as yourself"
The art of suffering, of experiencing and inflicting it, has been developing for
centuries in this land of intrigue, murder, and slavery, of brutal revolutions followed by
merciless supressions, of soul-less apparatchiks trapped in a self-devouring system, of
powerless men, battered women and endlessly crying children, ragged cats, three-legged
dogs and collective farm cows covered in a thick layer of dirt, all plodding about under
high-voltage power lines between fallen over reinfoced concrete fences in the shadow of
For a lover of pain there is no place better than Russia. Pain here is of the most
uncompromising quality. A bolivian farmer may live a tough life, but he, with his sombrero
hat and unhurried macho manners, may at least be pleasant to look at. But a Russian druken
muzhik lying in a ditch in his cotton-padded jacket and cheap Chinese boots represents
wasted life pure and simple. And Ethiopian children starve in the midst of a vast majestic
desert, and food caravans are on their way, thus reminding you that people are not quite
so uncaring as you need to believe. In Spain they managed to make art out of killing cows.
But in Russia you will see none of that. Here you will find the purest unadulterated
misery of the true connoisseur grade.
You will see dozens, hunderds or even thousands of sad, grumpy, unwashed faces. In
fact, a whole population of sick malnourished chain-smoking alcoholics will be there for
your pleasure of contemplating the the vanity of human existence.
To our clients we offer two options. Your individual trip can be carefully designed as
a participatory experience. You will be given the opportunity to sample heart-burn
inducing food from bus station eating establishments. As a special treat you'll be allowed
to use washrooms with toilets that don't flush - a site usually kept hidden from
package-tour travellers. On your request for a small extra fee we will arrange for your
money and documents to be stolen. Consumption of copious amounts of vodka combined with
smoking filter-less cigarettes will give you a memoralbe headache combined with nausea,
thus giving your a unique glimpse into an average Russian's soul on an average day..
Falling through uncovered manholes and stepping into excrements and exemplify the
little sparkles we've thrown all over this immersion tour.
You may, on the other hand, prefer detached observation. From the luxury of your hotel
or the comfort of your apartment you'll see garbage-strewen streets full of aggressive
obnoxious beggars, flat-headed criminals with their jeeps and gold chains, and ugly
prostitutes oozing with desease.
While our proposal primarily aims at private individuals, we are open to offers from
governments and penitentiary institutions of western countries. Malcontents and radicals
exiled to Russia for a couple of years are certain to beg for pardon. They will re-join
the civilized humanity full of appreciation for clean decent middle-class style of
Write us to arrange for this unique experience.....